Confessions of a yogaholic

The transformation, nay evolution, from a full-time features writer to a yoga instructor is one of the many risky, random leaps I’ve taken in my life. Today, I earn less than half of what I used to, cannot shop recklessly or take off on holidays and think 10 times before stepping out for a drink (since it’s never just one drink). But, on the positive side, I rise and shine at six in the morning, and help my students shine, too. I cook simple, homemade meals instead of wolfing down a bucket of fried chicken, biting into cheese burst pizzas or chugging umpteen cups of frothy cappuccinos while meeting story deadlines.

Today, I move, I bend, I nurture, as opposed to increasing the girth of my hips with a sedentary job year after year. White tea has replaced coffee, daal rice has replaced biryani and vetiver-flavoured water from an earthen pot has replaced sugary virgin mojitos. It feels good when my students leave the floor smiling, to know that I’ve managed to bust their stress in whatever way. But what you must know is that being a yoga teacher (rather any kind of fitness instructor) is not easy, no matter how many classes you take.

Contrary to the popular belief that all yoga instructors are vegans or vegetarians, we often crave for kebabs and grilled fish, there are days when we just don’t feel like getting into the zen zone and although we preach love, kindness and gratitude, we say hurtful things to our loved ones. Just like every normal human being, we have a few confessions to make. So I, along with my fellow yoginis on Instagram have rounded up 10 confessions that are sure to surprise you. Take a look!

  1. “I burp and fart at least twice when in my practice or go to attend any yoga class. It could be more depending on the intensity of practice!” #gassyyoginiproblems
  2. “When I’m in my second personal training, I’m hungry as a hog. It’s embarrassing when your stomach grumbles involuntarily. Now how are you supposed to suppress that? Especially when the scent of freshly made breakfast is wafting through your nostrils!”
    giphy (1)
  3. “I usually take a toilet break if my students fart in class… no matter how normal it is, it always makes me laugh.”
    source (1)
  4. “When you have to start class at 6 am sharp, you have limited time on the pot. Ever experienced the feeling of incomplete evacuation?”
    giphy (3)
  5. “It’s just impossible to have morning sex – unless your partner is a yogi or a runner. Well thank God mine is not because that would mean waking up even earlier.”
    giphy (8)
  6. “I make late night movie plans with my friends and fall asleep a little before the interval. Yes, even when the movie is really good.”
    giphy (4)
  7. “I don’t bounce out of bed every morning. I struggle with tiredness, stiffness and the deep desire to go back to sleep during that period of the month. And no, I don’t practice asanas to relieve menstrual cramps. I just pop a painkiller. It’s way easier.”
    giphy (5)
  8. “I love wine, I love cake, I love chocolate, I love coffee, I love mad parties, I love staying up late dancing and I have hangovers (I regret them too!).”
    giphy (6)
  9. “I dance around and practice my pirouettes when everyone is in Shavasana.”giphy
  10. “I always struggle with the ghosts of my past, feel angry, guilty, scared, sad and lonely… at times.”
    giphy (7)

8 thoughts on “Confessions of a yogaholic

  1. Humorous read, quite candid. I loved the interesting gif images attached to every point. Especially the Paadasana ! I don’t know why potty humour is a strict no no for women but we men would love to hear it more often Trrrrrrrrr! 🙂


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